Content:
- Any Communication Is Important on Every Stage of Relationships
- Key Topics for Discussion with a Girl You Like or Date
- What to Do If You Cannot Find Common Language?
- How to Ask a Girl Questions Without Offending Her?
- Tips to Keep the Conversation Going
- How to End the Talk Right?
Most of the misunderstandings and conflicts occur between people only because we do not know how to communicate with each other. We can’t convey our thoughts, we don’t hear what we are told, we blame and demand, instead of asking, and we do much more, trying to reach out to each other. Nonetheless, there is no mutual understanding and contact anyway.
How many couples broke up just because they lacked communication skills and competent communication! However, the ability to speak, hear, persuade, compromise, and negotiate is extremely important in relationships and everyday life. No wonder they say that in the modern world, one who knows how to build relationships will succeed.
In psychology, there is an important term, the ecology of relationships, which implies that harmony is where people care about themselves and their partners equally, without attacking another person or ignoring their thoughts, feelings and needs. The foundation of a good relationship is trust, sincerity, respect and open communication.
Any Communication Is Important on Every Stage of Relationships
Communication is a very important process, but sometimes, it might be difficult to achieve in practice when you meet single girls. Any relationship requires a certain level of communication. People who care about each other should know how to talk, exchange thoughts, ideas, and feelings. Quality communication is a foundation of healthy relationships. All other things, including attention, responsibilities, care, etc. are a result of proper communication. If you can discuss everything with your partner, literally everything, without condemnation, restraint, devaluation, and mockery as well as accusations, then you are the luckiest person, or you are just mature to build a healthy and harmonious relationship. Sometimes relationships can move too fast. To determine in what cases this happens you need to understand this well.
The practice shows that partners who are in love can communicate for hours about everything in the world. And it doesn’t matter whether it is about doubts, experiences, insecurities, hopes or on what stage of relationships they are now. There are no forbidden topics, including ex-relationships and physiological features of the single women seeking single men.
True intimacy is that you can show your true self to the partner. This does not mean that you have to live wide open (everyone needs privacy and personal space sometimes), it is about when you are ready to share something, and another person is ready to listen to you, and they are ready to understand, sympathy and support. They may have a different opinion and may not even agree with you, but they will not try to worsen your unstable state even more. They can wait for a better moment or pick up the right phrases to convey their thoughts in the right way.
Careful attitude and proper communication are what characterize healthy intimacy in any relationship. You don’t want to be a source of suffering for a soulmate but always love and care. Even disagreement will be expressed carefully.
For a person who loves, it is important to see that their beloved one develops, can implement their dreams, can rely on their understanding and support no matter what. A loved one should be happy. It is the foundation of a healthy and joyful relationship if both partners think so.
If a partner does not listen to your argumentation, then they don’t care about your happiness. If you cannot communicate with a loved one as with yourself, then you have no other loved one except yourself. So, it doesn’t matter on what stage your relationship is, anyway nothing will work out without communication.
Key Topics for Discussion with a Girl You Like or Date
On the Internet, you can easily find something like, “10 things to talk about with a girl,” but you should never rely entirely on these prepared topics as well as be afraid of silence. Communication is not a theatrical performance; therefore, you cannot pronounce memorized phrases during a conversation. The girl will immediately understand that the dialogue is thought out in advance and will lose interest in you. So, even if you use the below-mentioned list of things to talk about with your girl, you shouldn’t forget to take a pause in the conversation. It will emphasize the beauty and originality of the moment. So, there is no need to be afraid of silence. Besides, you can always improvise while listening to the girl’s story. This skill is useful when there is no single thought in your head. Women always tell interesting things. You can take advantage of this and come up with a new example of things to talk about with a girl. As a result, both of you will become more open and liberated.
1. Hobby
Everyone has at least one thing on this list of their hobbies and passions, it is among the best things to talk about with a girl. Women always try something new, improve themselves, and develop. The main task of a man is to find out what the interlocutor is interested in, how she spends her free time. Hobbies will fully reveal her nature and tell what kind of person she is. As a result, you will find out what things inspire the girl and cause positive emotions. This information will come you in handy if you are going to get closer to your crush. You should carefully listen to the young lady so as not to miss the details of the conversation. Having learned the nuances of her life, it will be easier for you to build further dialogue.
2. Sport
It is one of the interesting things to talk about with your girl crush if you know that she is a big sports fan. Nowadays, many women do yoga, go to the gym or are interested in dancing. Such activity allows them to keep fit and improve their physical skills. If a girl goes in for sports, you should praise her, but try to not overdo that. You can ask for how long she is involved in such activity and why she has chosen exactly it. If you share her love for sports, you can tell about your preferences, the rules for training, or give some tips on choosing a diet if you are asked about it. You should be careful with the latter moment. If a girl is curvy, and she doesn’t ask you anything about proper nutrition, you shouldn’t even mention anything about that.
3. Childhood
Many people think about childhood with warmth and joy, so it can become one of the fun things to talk about with a girl. For many women, this time plays a key role in their education and development. So, it is one of the good things to talk about with a girl you like. You can ask what a kid she was in her childhood, what she loved to play, what her parents taught her, etc. At this moment, she will plunge into childhood memories and feel like a defenseless little girl. This topic of conversation will be an important moment in communication since it will cause positive emotions in the lady. If you have some fun stories from your childhood, you should share them. So, you will show your trust and sympathy for the woman. As a result, you will get a bit closer to each other.
4. Preferences in music and movies
Music and movies are among neutral things to talk about with a girl over text and in person. Nonetheless, they can give you pretty much information about the person you are communicating with as well as help understand whether your preferences coincide. Anyone has their musical preferences and favorite genres in movies. You may ask what music she listens to, whether she attends concerts or festivals as well as what films or, possibly, TV shows she watches, what her favorite actors and film genres are. Besides, don’t forget to share your tastes and preferences, thus, you will have a good dialogue. One day, this info may come you in handy when you start thinking about great date ideas to please your beloved partner.
5. Traveling
If you don’t know what topic to discuss with a girl, then you can ask her something about traveling. This activity is in vogue nowadays, so you will surely find something to talk about. For example, you can ask her what countries and cities she has already visited, where she dreams to go in the nearest future and in general, what destination impressed her the most and why. A perfect starter can be simple questions like, “Do you like to travel? What type of travel do you like? What do you pay attention to when traveling?” You can ask any questions about traveling that pop up in your head and don’t forget to share your personal experience. Such topics seem very simple, but they are the ones that can work wonders. She will share with you something personal, her emotions, impressions, and dreams. And this means a lot.
6. Place of residence
As you can see, there are so many answers to the question, “What are the topics to discuss with a girl?” And the desired place of residence is one of them. It is about preferences and common goals. People with different characters and even temperaments can create a strong happy family. However, if their goals in life are too different, such a union will not last long. The residence issues seem commonplace, but they play important roles. For example, if one of you wants to live in a big city, taking advantage of all the benefits of civilization, and the second stands for the quiet comfort of the suburb and its nature, a conflict of interest will arise. The way out can be found in separate accommodation, but this option is not suitable for everyone. Discussing such a topic also helps evaluate the depth and number of possible demands. The main issue can be the compatibility of your views.
7. Plans
When you reflect on things to talk about with your girlfriend, don’t forget to discuss your plans for the future. They show how much a woman thinks about her future, whether she relies on herself or other people, what her ambitions are. And most importantly, her answer can be compared with her expectations from life. Little things can differ, there is nothing reprehensible in this. However, if the girl’s story and your thoughts are too different, it makes no sense to waste your time on each other. In general, plans say a lot about a person. They reflect the inner world and the aspirations of the interlocutor as well as demonstrate their true attitude to life. People do not change quickly and at someone’s whim.
What to Do If You Cannot Find Common Language?
“Find a good partner, and five years of marriage will save you with a year of psychotherapy.” If a couple has the skill and tradition of conversations developed in the "peace time", then in a crisis that abounds in family life, this will be a great advantage.
Many men tend to endure discomfort silently, and then disappear. Women by nature cope with communication better. It is important to use this distinction not for the struggle for power, but for the development of mutual understanding. When a woman can help a man talk about feelings, in response he helps her not to “sink” in them, but to proceed to the right actions. Many couples need such a tradition. A woman, who is, on the one hand, deprived of support, feels miserable.
Start with any question, but look at it from a new angle. Maybe the partner is having a hard time at work? Do not immediately try to find the guilty or limit yourself to sympathetic phrases: “Your boss does not value you,” “This company is not worthy of you.” Yes, you flattered the ego of the interlocutor, but such a message brought nothing new into their or into your life. Try to talk about how what prospects your partner sees in his career. Are there any advantages of this situation? Are they still able to learn new things? Do they seethemselves in another professional field? Instead of discussing the matter at the primitive level, try to talk about how the partner sees the situation, what they feel, whether they are ready to move forward. Such conversations give us the strength to rethink a lot in life.
Talk about your condition and not about your partner: "I'm angry" instead of "You infuriate me." Do not attack. Ask more. Test your fantasies: “What do you feel now?” instead of "you hate me." Be careful with ratings and criticism. Do not try to talk against the desire, both yours and your partner. Know how to say “stop” if you are uncomfortable. It is important to give a say, sometimes just saying it out loud allows you to reconsider your own thought.
How to Ask a Girl Questions Without Offending Her?
Now you are well aware of the correct answer to the question, “What are the things to discuss with a girl?” And if you don’t cross the line of politeness, everything will be okay. It is impossible to offend an adequate girl with simple questions about traveling or her music preferences, however, if you start asking about some “forbidden” things, then everything can get out of control. If you don’t want to find yourself in an awkward situation, then forget about the following questions even if the level of your curiosity is really high.
1. Why do not you have a partner?
This question is inappropriate during the first conversations and dates for several reasons. Firstly, you still do not know each other enough so that a person can trust you that much and talk about personal, innermost things. Previous relationships could end for various reasons. It could be a painful breakup or even the death of a partner. Or a person takes the matter of love relationships very seriously and is not ready to get in touch with inappropriate people, and she has not met her soulmate yet. If you want to become such a person, be careful. Even if you are genuinely interested in the answer to this question, you will get it over time when you get closer to each other.
2. What do you expect from our relationship?
At first, this question may seem quite tactful and logical if people are on a romantic date. However, if you haven’t moved in, then your relationship cannot be called extremely serious. You just look closely at each other, try to understand how interesting and reliable the person is, whether it is worth continuing to communicate with them. For this reason, your question may seem too arrogant to the girl, and she can get offended. Besides, it will show that you desperately want a relationship and, perhaps, it is not so important for you who this relationship will be with.
3. Why do you ask?
This question seems to be the most harmless of all. However, judge for yourself. If you answer each question of the interlocutor in a monosyllabic way to quickly ask her why she asks this, the girl will simply stop showing interest. Remember that any communication is about a dialogue that should make none of you feel tension or fetter. If you are asked about something, it means a girl is interested in you, she wants to figure out what you are. No need to distort and interrogate her if you don’t want to offend the lady.
Tips to Keep the Conversation Going
Communication with your girlfriend should be diverse. Choose topics that will allow you to know each other from different sides but will not cause discomfort. You should choose them, considering the level of proximity and duration of your communication. Remember that the first meetings or correspondence on social networks or dating sites should give you an idea of the interlocutor. Depending on the style of your communication, the topics can be funny or fascinating. Nonetheless, if you want to keep your conversation going, you should pay attention to the following tips.
Know how to open up
It is difficult to establish confidential communication with a stranger, but if you learn to open your soul and feelings, a girl will be able to understand you better and will be frank with you. Unfortunately, it’s much easier for people to say what others would like to hear. Being afraid to offend her feelings or be criticized, you may avoid expressing your real feelings. A girl will not be able to respond to the situation the way you would like it if she does not know for sure what you feel and what you expect from her. Easiness is the key to the continuation of communication.
Be an attentive listener
Do you really listen to a girl when she tries to express her feelings and a point of view? You can hear the words, but do you fully understand what she is trying to say? During an important conversation, you should better repeat what your interlocutor said in your own words. If you’ve misunderstood the point of view of the girl, she will be able to correct you. This not only helps avoid misunderstanding but also helps you know and understand your girlfriend at a deeper level and keep the talk going.
Be tactful
How to discuss with a girl? To open up does not mean to viciously criticize another person. You can tactfully discuss a delicate situation if that happens. Both of you may not understand that you upset each other with some actions if you don’t sort things out. You cannot read each other’s thoughts; therefore, you may not even suspect that you have offended each other. And before coming at the girl, you should try to delicately discuss the problem that has arisen, allowing her to explain herself.
Learn to admit your mistakes
Being open and honest also includes admitting that you are wrong. This is one of the most difficult aspects of communication. No one likes being wrong. However, if you hurt a loved one, you must do everything to correct this situation. How can someone believe that you care about him or her if you cannot admit that you hurt this person? This does not mean to say, “I'm sorry” but to admit that you were wrong and sincerely apologize to the girl.
Seek for a compromise
There are moments when many discussions do not lead to a single solution. If this is a serious matter, then you should reconsider your relationship, but in many cases, such situations are only a small misunderstanding. But if you really value the girl, then you should not stop communicating because of a small difference in opinions. By working on a deeper level of communication, you can strengthen the bond between you.
How to End the Talk Right?
When you have already talked on all possible topics when communicating by phone or in real life, you must carefully end the conversation. You can’t abruptly stop answering or be silent so as not to look rude. If you behave like that, a girl might think that you are not interested in her. To prevent this situation, you should slowly bring the dialogue to an end. The woman will understand your hint. If you don’t have time for communication, you should tell the girl about it. In such situations, it is necessary to act carefully so that the interlocutor does not lose interest. A relationship with a girl is a new stage in the life of a man. Now you know how to communicate with almost any young lady on the Internet, by phone or in person.
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