1. Why People Feel Insecure About Their Relationships During a Lockdown
  2. How to Help Yourself to Survive the Lockdown
  3. Romantic Things to Do for Maintaining Relationships During a Lockdown
  4. Main Don’ts for Lockdown Dating
  5. Consider This a New Challenge for Your Relationships
  6. Why it may not work?

The need for self-isolation at home caused a shock at first, but life is gradually getting better, and you get back on track just in a slightly modified form. On the Web, you can run into numerous jokes about introverts who enjoy this loneliness to the fullest. Indeed, people have different psychological settings that allow them to react with a different modality to the sharply reduced intensity of social life. However, many researchers point to the combined nature of the stress factors generated by the current crisis.

Someone suffers from the inability to take long walks, someone misses tactile sensations and cursing with beloved ones, while still others do not want to stay with children in an extremely limited space 24/7. Nowadays, each of us is fighting their stress. Even if the causes of stress in another person have nothing to do with ours, we are likely to suffer equally intensively.

lockdown and relationships

Why People Feel Insecure About Their Relationships During a Lockdown

Today, the best thing we can do for those around us is to stay home. However, not everyone will find this experience to be easy. Thus, the number of couples who decided to break off relationships sharply increased in China in early March 2020. So, it looks like a lockdown and relationships are not the best combination. Why people feel insecure?

Well, uncertainty is one of the most stressful components of this period. People cancel important events, trips, completely rebuild their plans, and no one can say how long this situation will last. In such conditions, it is extremely difficult not to give in to anxiety even for those who are usually not exposed to it. Our brain does not like to exist in uncertainty, it seeks to explain everything and take control. When this is not possible, we feel stressed. Isolation can increase anxiety and depression. People who are already struggling with mental illnesses may experience worsening symptoms in isolation.

Thus, many people subconsciously transfer strong stress from events in the world to relationships, and men start communicating with girls online. It affects their self-esteem and makes it possible to examine a partner through a microscope and dig deeper into their shortcomings. It can be difficult to separate the feelings that you feel for the situation in the world from those that you actually feel for a partner. Impossibility of full contact with the outside world, anxieties, and far-fetched fears, as well as constant tension, start inevitably affect relationships. It is easier for a person to direct their anger to a partner since they cannot drain off excess emotion outside. Well, in such a situation, they cannot even start cheating in a long-distance relationship. Anyway, in most cases, these emotions are caused by negative news, tiredness, and just a bad mood.

According to psychologists, rare couples can endlessly coexist in close contact since it provokes quarrels and misunderstandings, this is the usual scenario of such situations. It happens that a desire to break up is an attempt to escape from the situation in general. While those who have started maintaining relationships on lockdown, being in different places, also face stress due to the inability to exchange emotions and have physical contact. In fact, people are used to a certain development of events, and they do not understand how it is possible to combine lockdown and dating. Nobody had such an experience until this year.

How to Help Yourself to Survive the Lockdown

When the news feed is full of negativity, the general situation is getting worse in the world, and you are far away from your beloved partner, it is hard to stay in a good mood. Over time, this can lead to reduced productivity, worsening relationships with loved ones, and depression. Forced self-isolation is not a reason to stand still, silently look out the window and suffer from boredom. On the contrary, you have a great opportunity for self-development and rethinking of priorities. Usually, we don’t have enough time and desire for that. So, even if you are dating from home, you may still suffer and feel anxiety. The following things will help you abstract from oppressive reality and its news, will bring real benefits, and help survive while you are apart with your significant other.

lockdown and dating1. Read less news

Staying informed is important, but you should not overdo it with monitoring the feed on social networks. The modern world is susceptible not only to disease but also to the occurrence of info-epidemic on its background. Thus, an abundance of fake and troubling news spreads panic among people. Not to succumb to the general madness, choose 2-3 authoritative sources, and watch the content about the disease created by them every few days. Enjoy the nice little things instead. It may be the smell of freshly brewed coffee, your baked bread, or morning yoga. Although now you cannot have your usual lifestyle, you can still look for the good in what you have not noticed before.

2. Do not forget to chat with loved ones

Now it is the very moment when you can improve relations with parents or call friends you have not communicated with for several years. It is not clear when your self-isolation ends, but we all realize that it will be still difficult to travel freely between cities and countries for a long time. Use every opportunity to talk with loved ones since it is hard to say when you meet in person. Thus, you can survive this period together with close people without going into self-digging or focusing too much on your partner.

3. Read books

An old and proven way to entertain yourself is to read books. Today, thanks to the Internet, it is not necessary to have an impressive library at home to actively read new books. Online libraries contain many copies of world literature. You can read books online or download them and continue reading, even if the Internet is disconnected. Thanks to reading books, you not only find out something new and spend time with pleasure but also improve your visual memory, learn new words, and develop your brain. The main thing about books is that you can never say that you have already read everything.

4. Continue self-development

If you spend a lot of time at home, this does not mean that you cannot spend these hours to good use, besides being involved in lockdown dating. So, in addition to entertainment and household chores, you can do self-development. Thanks to online lessons, you can learn foreign languages, get the necessary skills in various professions, or even get some new skills. You can learn acting, playing the guitar or piano, singing or cooking gourmet dishes. When you stop dating under lockdown and meet in person with your significant other, you will be able to please them with your new skills.

5. Be grateful

Gratitude means accepting all life situations and the opportunity to experience happiness from them. Doctor of Philosophy, author of the book “The Upside of Stress: Why Stress Is Good for You,” Kelly McGonigal advises not to worry about things that do not matter much and write down in a diary everything that you can be grateful to this world for. This means that you can even be grateful for the things that cause you stress. Let us say you stay apart with your significant other and practice isolation dating, yes, it can be difficult, but it is also a chance to strengthen your relationship and get to know each other from new sides.

Romantic Things to Do for Maintaining Relationships During a Lockdown

This lockdown has provided couples with a chance to sort out their relationship since they cannot escape from their problems that easy now. Someone tries online dating during the lockdown, others can barely spend the whole day together, and still others plan to get divorced as soon as the lockdown will be over. Long-distance relationships are always about intrigue, complexity, and play. You already know how to support them, but the problem of the current situation is that now you do not know how long the distance will separate you. A self-isolation is not a reason to communicate more closely, more often, and bother each other ad nauseam. Yes, you have more free time, but this does not mean that personal boundaries should be blurred. Respect your partner’s space, find yourself an interesting activity, and share positive news. It would be great if you arrange dates, joint candlelit dinners of the 21st century with the help of the

Internet and other technologies. Do not devalue lockdown love stories. Don’t postpone bright moments. Separation is useful, it provides the opportunity for solitude, a clear view on common values, and it makes it clear how much you understand and want to be together. If you begin to depreciate yourself, believing that your life without a partner has stopped, and self-isolation and dating cannot work out, there is a high probability that your couple will break up.

1. Arrange a candlelight dinner

Even though the world tries to survive the lockdown, you are apart, and all cafes are closed, you still can arrange a romantic dinner, having ordered food. All restaurants provide the opportunity to deliver everything you want from the menu. So, you can order your partner their favorite dishes, desserts, and even a bottle of wine. Such a gesture is always considered romantic, and it’s especially pleasant at such times. It can be a complete surprise for your significant other, or you can agree to choose something to your liking and treat each other with something tasty.

lockdown love stories2. Compile positive news

To find something positive in the endless negative information flow is a real challenge that can be met only for the sake of a dear person. Gloomy and restless news only worsens our state of self-isolation. Make regular selections of positive, sweet, or just fun news, videos, or memes for each other, so your day starts with something nice except for your regular good morning message. This advice is especially suitable both for those who are in long-distance relationships during the lockdown time.

3. Record a video of your song, poem, or dance

It is a cute and funny way to show your significant other how much you miss them. Everything here depends on your talents, but anyway it is a wonderful way to cheer up your partner and stay in touch, dating during the lockdown. Devote them a song, poem, dance, picture, whatever. It does not matter how beautifully or professionally it is done. The goal is to share with your partner your feelings in a creative way at a time when you cannot be together.

4. Invite them to the online theater

Nowadays, services offer free access to anything: lectures, films, online excursions to museums. You can even find broadcasts of performances, and this is a good idea for a romantic date when you are both isolated. Try to bring the evening as close as possible to a real visit to the theater: create an atmosphere with dim lights, dress up, feel like you are not just going to watch the next movie, but doing something special. The advantage of such an entertainment program is that you can drink wine in such a theater not only at intermission.

5. Have a virtual thematic date night

Being in isolation, the Chinese even managed to party at local raves without leaving their home: they went to live clubs, drank, and had fun, imagining that they were on the dance floor. If you are not ready for such fun, then you will definitely appreciate a virtual thematic date night. You can come up with dishes in one theme, for example, devote an evening to France. So, you can watch a French movie, cook, or order French dishes, fill glasses with French wine and enjoy chatting using group video chat.

6. Work out together

Sport is important during the lockdown so that your body will neither forget how to move nor become overweight, especially in conditions of constant dangerous proximity to the refrigerator. Besides, it is a great chance to finally begin to watch your body or just try something new together. Choose what you like best: yoga, Pilates, capoeira, karate, Zumba, salsa, or just daily workout. There is a lot of online courses for free self-study, so you will easily find something to your liking.

7. Play online games

Interactive video games also provide scope for communication and help feel unity with a partner when you are in isolation. Studies show that during a team computer game, people develop management skills, working together to achieve common goals, and the ability to make quick decisions. So moderate interest in video games can help with professional development in addition to having a great pastime together.

8. Send a reminder about yourself

Let it be not just a message on social networks. Turn on the partner’s imagination by sending them a parcel with little things: printed photos, jewelry, a small bottle of perfume that you usually use. Additionally, you can put massage oil or a small sex device there. You can order a gift in a specialized store along with courier door-to-door service.

9. Discuss good sex

During isolation, there is not enough physical proximity, so you should try to compensate it by mental one. Your common task with the partner is to create a space in which you can talk about what the phrase “good sex” means for each of you. Sometimes it turns out after such conversations that partners have different ideas about that. Take time to discuss what types of caresses you like and what new you would like to try. Preferences may change with time, and it is important to be aware of this.

10. Use sex toys

New generation devices allow you to synchronize partner toys and simulate sex in a couple. For example, some sets transmit to the male masturbator a rhythm in which a woman uses a vibrator. About the same way gadgets work in the opposite direction. If paired items seem incomprehensible, you can start with toys controlled remotely using the smartphone app.

Main Don’ts for Lockdown Dating

At the beginning of the lockdown, advice on supporting mental health during this time was perceived skeptically, but now even the most emotionally stable people and strong families feel the tension from being in such a situation for a long time. How to date on lockdown? Bear in mind all the previous tips and follow the next ones.

lockdown datingDon’t ignore any ways of communicating

To successfully get through this period with your loved one, you need to communicate online more often. Even though video calling doesn’t replace a live conversation and hugs, it will allow you to share important news and maintain relationships. You can also maintain communicating via instant messengers or social networks. Do not forget to write regularly and tune your soulmate to a positive wave. You can share funny pictures, exciting videos, and useful materials. Thus, you will always find a common topic for conversation.

Don't hesitate to apologize

This is the easiest way to smooth out a conflict. Even if you don’t think you’ve made a mistake, you can at least admit that you didn’t want to offend or hurt your partner. And it does not matter whether it's about a misunderstanding or a silly joke. Politeness is always appropriate because it is a demonstration of respect. Remember that an apology can also be offensive, so carefully select the words.

Do not be monotonous

Isolation is the case when a carefully planned daily routine turns life into a groundhog day. Combine the methods that we have listed or come up with your ways to spend time with benefit. The main thing is to try to spend your days at least a bit different. So, you will be able to maintain communication and enjoy dating.

Do not forget about the contact

Communicate with loved ones by video calls, arrange streams with joint watching TV shows since there are services that allow people at a distance to watch the same picture together. The same applies to meet potential partners – do not give up this idea, if you do not want to, just keep all communication online for a while.

Do not make important decisions

You should not break up during the lockdown time, even if it seems to you that your differences are irreconcilable. Take a break for a while and let yourself get back on track first. Perhaps this will help understand that both of you just lost your temper.

Consider This a New Challenge for Your Relationships

It’s extremely difficult for most people to be at home 24/7 without any outside contacts. They have left their comfort zone and feel out of place. And at this stage, it is important to realize that this time can give a lot of new opportunities if you use it correctly. Of course, in this situation, it is difficult to pick up one single universal advice because all couples are different.

Nonetheless, this period can show you the true essence of your relationships and demonstrate weaknesses that require your attention. Accordingly, those who have fragile relationships need to make every effort to preserve them. And those couples whose relationships are built on a solid foundation will be able to get closer even more and know each other in a new way.

Why it may not work?

People are not robots. Our psyche is not software. To adapt, we need time. The situation is complicated by the fact that we are talking about the interaction between people in this article. People have different adaptability, different levels of awareness, different readiness for change, different dynamics. The more people in the process, the more difficult and longer it takes to establish.

Remember, for success, you and your partner must accept the rules of the game. You both have to understand that you need it and it is important. Both of you should participate in the development of a schedule convenient for you. And you both must accept and experience absolutely all of its points. Remember about the flexibility of borders, cooperate, and do not hide your needs - declare them, and find a way to satisfy them together.

Remember that personal integrity and value are more important than maintaining relationships in which you cannot be yourself. We believe that this is a time to review and strengthen borders and values. Love and be together if both of you really want it.

Comments (1)
30.04.2020 11:03
My girlfriend and I live in Spain and we cannot go outside without a reason. Therefore we are constantly in a confined space together. I thought we could not maintain our relationship in such conditions, but your advice came to the rescue on time. Our evenings are now varied, and it seems to me that our relationship has become only stronger.

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